"- don't be so quick to knock it. People don't usually part with the weird shit they personally know because they know how easy it will be to punch holes in. Now I'm tellin you somethin. It's for you to poke through the soup and find the meat." John Patrick Shanley's 'the dreamer examines his pillow'

Saturday, February 25, 2006


Neil: anger. why? racism. FUCK. you are amazing.
Jennifer: love. Why? I can't see her, so no complexities crowd my mind and she is free to be simply love. I wonder if absence really does make the heart grow fonder, or if it pulls back the veil of self-protection and deception we subtly (subconsciously?) put up when we're physically with someone?
Nathan: Insanity. obviously no explanation needed; he understands. a long talk and a good wrestling match would be greatly beneficial.
Kirsten: guilt. why? you wrote to me and i cared so much i couldn't find the words to put down to say the right thing, so i left you without any words. Once again, the desire to perform well, to do the right thing ATE the possibility of real human contact and gaining something from my mistakes. story of my life.
myself: grey. blurred lines. not enough courage to hope for clarity... maybe it's better this way? foot is asleep.
elysia: desire. why? She does. I love it. Inspired by her desire to "suck the marrow out of life," as it were. Desire to express how much i love that as well as her insecurities and quirkiness. Reaching out a hand to you...
mother: anticipation. why? can i make a long term relationship work? ours is constantly growing and changing or doing the opposite of growing, whatever that is. dying? ew. my symbol of a commited, stuck-together relationship with all the highs and lows our pettiness and larger souls have to offer. and a lot of fuzzy in between times. Can't wait to see her and find out how we'll fare this time. (spring breack in March)
The Gotter: hope? love, sexy, too sexy, stress, LOVE, enjoyment, excitement, what's inside? blue, ripped apart, life-dream, understand, lost with you. why? who the hell knows why we go through what we do? Good thing we do it anyway.
Lenny: where are you... why? i really want you out of the woods and into the picture with me. where are you? are you living? happyish? i can't stop caring about you. stop hoping i will.



yes!! there is great good in my world!!! beauty is everywhere - (microscope occasionally required, but entirely worth it)


Blogger kirsten said...

Could we talk privately for like, say, 2 days when you come for your spring break? I really miss the sound of your voice and these past few weeks, especially today, have been crappy to where I don't care about anything anymore... yes, i know that's not very uplifting, but it's what i'm feeling. I love you!!

11:56 PM

Blogger Crystal said...

elizabeth, i love you! i can't wait til you come home...it's sooooo soon!!!! ok, a few weeks, but still...that's pretty close. hanging out is definitly a must. love ya!

12:20 PM

Blogger Elysia said...

Hey luv. So... your spring break and mine do not mesh. Mine's the week after yours. Fortunately I'm done with my finals after the 21st I think, so maybe we can work something out, and I may be coming home to see the state dance team the 18th maybe?? Yeah. I know you're going to be very much in demand this short break you have, but I would actually like to request some time from you, as much as you can spare. Seeing as how this has been the worst term ever, I'm sorry but I need to be a little selfish. Maybe you can come visit me a day?
I love you!

5:24 PM

Blogger Neilio Wongizzle said...


making you and me friends in eternity. you are amazing

7:09 PM


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